Consciously Close

Mark 10:32 - 45

This is the first Sunday of Lent, traditionally a season of self-examination, prayer, fasting and works of love.

As we begin our 40 day journey, I want to slow down the impulse to jump in with both feet. If these next 40 days are to correspond to other spiritual quests that involved 40 days or 40 years, it seems best to me to be conscious of what we do and why. The 40 years that the Israelites walked through the wilderness and the 40 days that Jesus spent after being whisked away to the desert were not well planned spiritual events on a church liturgical calendar. They were foisted upon our unsuspecting heroes. We have the benefit of being able to look back and reflect.

Mark 9:33 – 37 records an earlier conversation with a similar theme to the passage in Mark 10. It is about who is the greatest and Jesus uses a child as an example. The disciples had a hard time learning the lesson that Jesus wasn't calling them to power, he was calling them to relationship. The example of the children wasn't to teach his disciples to be totally dependent on God as children are on their parents. Jesus is teaching about being welcoming – "Whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me, and whoever welcomes me welcomes the one who sent me."

In our text today James and John want to be Jesus' right and left hand guys. This time Jesus uses the example of being a servant. Here he says, "Whoever wishes to become great amoung you must be your servant, and whoever wishes to be first amoung you must be servant of all." I think the teaching here is not "how to be great in 2 easy lessons." I think the point is that what they are wishing for is wrong. They are looking at the prevailing power structure in their society, one where might makes right and if you have enough money you can have power and privilege too and they seek to mimic it in their own community. Jesus is teaching that the whole set-up of society is wrong.

I have been meditating on this dynamic of the disciples to seek power and the tradition of Lent which is based in self-denial and suffering for the sake of purity. One seems to be the flip side of the other. In order for us to not behave in a power hungry manner we will deny ourselves. I know that for some Lent is a powerful ritual of intentional self-examination. But for others it is just another way to feel defeated and not good enough. I don't believe the God of Love asks people who have meager resources to fast from nourishment. I don't believe the God of Love asks those of us who have been beaten down by the system to flagellate themselves ... to punish themselves ... to think less of themselves ... for the sake of holiness and to be close to Jesus.

When the disciples seek to be great, Jesus tells them that they need to take the posture of a servant and to welcome children. These teachings aren't about how to be close to your Divine Beloved, they are teachings against striving for greatness and power.

What is the point of Lent? I don't want to take away anyone's ritual, but I do want to challenge the why and the how. When someone tends toward some kind of excess, then Lent might be just the right opportunity to examine that and take an initiative toward correcting it. If we forget to be prayerful or to do works of love, then Lent is a good time to begin again the practice of prayer and good works. But fasting, prayer and good works aren't the point of Lent. Feeling bad about yourself is not the point of Lent. Feeling good about how bad you feel about yourself should not be the point of Lent.

I think being consciously close to Jesus is the point of Lent. The hunger from fasting, the concentration of prayer, and the sacrifice of good works are supposed to remind us to walk consciously close to Jesus. Hunger itself isn't holy. Depriving yourself from something you love doesn't bring you closer to God. What brings you closer to God is walking closer to God.

Does a temporary abstinence from something help to remind you to fix your thoughts on what Philippians teaches ... "whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is pleasing, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise"? Fixing our thoughts on these things helps us walk closer to Jesus.

James and John – the brothers who asked Jesus if they could sit at his right hand and his left hand – they asked the wrong question. The disciples who were arguing about who would be the greatest – they were asking the wrong question. But why were they asking these questions? What was really motivating them? Was it the quest for power? Was it the desire for fame? There may have been some of that. But once they realized Jesus wasn't in it for the fame and the power and that likely they would receive none either, why did they continue to follow?

I believe that the requests the followers made were misguided attempts to emulate the Messiah. I think what they wanted most of all was to be as close as possible to Jesus. They were still in the learning phase of what that meant and the best way to go about it. They didn't yet have the emotional or spiritual tools to be able to tell Jesus how much they loved him and wanted to be like him ... how often they wanted to be near him ... how afraid they were to be without him.

For us, walking with Jesus takes a different form. We cannot physically walk down the road with our Messiah. We can't ask him questions face to face. Wouldn't that be great to be able to do ... even if our questions were wrong? He would be right there and yet, doesn't it happen that even when someone is "right there" that sometime we end up still not being with them. Here's a question you don't have tell me the answer to ... how many times during this service have you phased out? Even though you are sitting in your chair in this room, how much of the time have you been somewhere else? I'm not bringing this up to criticize. It happens to me too. I phase in and out ... I come and go even though I'm right here.

This kind of thing happens to us everywhere. We can be with our spouse, our kids, our bestest of best friends and still, we are not always conscious of where we are and who we're with.

Often we even phase in and out of paying attention to ourselves. If Jesus were here amoung us, if he was a member of this congregation, eventually we would take him for granted at least some of the time ... just like we do now.

This time of Lent, however you practice it, is a time to draw close to Jesus. This is a time to stay in the room with him and with yourself. The disciples got one thing right ... they may have asked the wrong questions and not understood a lot of the parables ... but they loved Jesus and they kept walking with him as close as they could. James and John wanted to be as close to Jesus as possible. They didn't care which one of them was on the right hand and which was on the left hand, but they each wanted to be able to take Jesus' hand at a moment's notice.

As consciously as you can, try to remember to walk close to Jesus. See if you can pay attention to when you phase in and out. How do you talk differently when you are walking beside the Messiah ... the Healer ... the one who is your Divine Beloved? What choices do you make that are different? Do you treat others differently when you are consciously in the presence of the God of Love?

This Christ who we worship, this man who defended those that others called sinners ... who spoke out against religious arrogance ... who willingly took a beating because he would not take back what he said and because he would not stop healing people's bodies any and every day of the week ... when you are consciously in the presence of the Christ and allow the love that you have for Jesus to flow through you, what are you like?

Jesus is a member of this congregation. Jesus sits in the midst of us. This Lent, whatever else you do, I encourage you to apply yourself to be in the presence of the God of Love as the focus of your 40 day spiritual journey.