Sunday, November 23, 2008

The Meaning of a Day

November 22, 1990
My mother died that morning. 18 years ago yesterday my mother died. That was a long time ago. I was fairly young - in my mid 20's. Much more has happened since then, yet the pain lingers. Where is her recipe for those beloved chocolate cake-like cookies with the peppermint frosting? Exactly how did she make the pork chops in baked beans that I loved so much? What gave her the idea to put old rag socks on me and let me slide on the waxed kitchen floor to help her buff it? What would she think about me being a Baptist minister?

Yesterday I remembered the day that we did not go to the hospital to sit with her, hold her, cry with her, laugh with her, read from the Bible to her. Yesterday I remembered the Thanksgiving dinner we were not going to have together, but we did. Yesterday I remembered the relief I felt at my fathers words on the phone at 5am, "It's over." Those are words I will never forget.

Today I realize that this anniversary of my mother's death was not a mourning of the day she died. Rather, it was, and still is today, a mourning of the 2 years of her illness. It is a mourning of the last year of her life, from the day after the Thanksgiving of 1989 when she almost died and we brought her to the hospital for the first time. It is a mourning of how God did not heal her, not through the laying on of my hands or through the laying on of any hands. It is a mourning of the vigil we kept, of the vigil over which I was willing to lose my job because I was not going to miss this opportunity. It was a mourning that it took a disease to bring about healing in specific parts of our relationship.

November 22nd is the day my mother died, but her death was a mercy. Her disease is what I mourn. Her absence is what I mourn. November 22nd marks the time of her illness up till then, and marks the time of her absence since then. All of November mourning is creeping inside of me. All of December and January mourning is continuing in me. It is like a time release capsule. Slow and mostly steady, with some bursts of release from time to time. It is like a program running in the background. Sometimes it interrupts the program of my life that I am working in. My thought process slows, sometimes it freezes, although not like it used to. Sometimes I recognize what is going on, but sometimes I have to go into my Task Manager and look at what's running. There I am reminded of what is happening in the background.

November 22nd means so much more than the events that happened November 22, 1990. No wonder it fills me. No wonder it slows the rest of my thinking and heightens the rest of my feelings. No wonder I seek comfort in the arms of my Divine Beloved. And no wonder I ask my Holy Love why? Why? Why that way? Why then?

Today is November 23rd. But inside of me it is always November 22nd.

What day lives in you?

Saturday, November 22, 2008

AMBER ALERT - from Maryland

PLEASE HELP US BY FORWARDING THIS EMAIL UNTIL THIS REACHES A
WORLD-WIDE AUDIENCE AND JEWEL IS RETURNED HOME SAFELY

Racharel Strong (father) - 404-357-1881

Simona Strong (mother) - 404-313-4255

Tiesa Locklear (aunt) - 678-234-4902

Tramesa Locklear (aunt) 678-480-1635

Ursala Williams (aunt) 678-362-5246





Thursday, November 20, 2008

Transgender Day of Remembrance

Michael Dillon May 1, 1915 - May 15, 1962
The first recorded transman to undergo phalloplasty.



He was an athlete and an Oxford Man; an author (Self: A Study in Endocrinology and Ethics) and sailor; a doctor and a Buddhist Monk.

His death is a mystery.

His biography, The First Man-Made Man, was written by Pagan Kennedy (Bloomsbury 2007)

Monday, November 17, 2008

Harriet's Daughter posted about the American Family Association's product called "The Original Christmas Cross earlier today. Here is a picture of this product.



One of the folks who commented to the post left the contact link to the AFA. Here is what I wrote to the AFA, and here is the link if you want to write. https://store.afa.net/t-contact.aspx

Please write to them.

******************************************

As a white Christian and a Pastor I am abhorred at your Christmas Cross. This faux burning cross is a racist symbol. As you are no doubt well aware, racist and evil white men have burned crosses on the yards of Black churches and Black homes for years.

In whose yard is this supposed to be displayed, the purchaser or the purchaser's victim? Has the burning cross strategy changed, now that we have an African American president-elect? Do we display faux burning crosses as a symbol of our racism and evil in our own yards?

In the name of our beloved Christ, I implore you to pull this product immediately and to issue an apology to African Americans.

Friday, November 14, 2008

Prop 8 - Who's Responsible?

White Men

Queer people, people of colour, disabled people, poor people, etc ... if we don't see ourselves in one another, then we cannot move forward in unity against those who oppress us. If we don't see that the most disenfranchised from this kind of division is the poor, disabled, lesbian of colour, and that she should be able to live free and in joy, then we are selfish and narrow-minded.

These are some of the leaders of Proposition 8. Without them, there wouldn't have been a Prop 8. If you want to blame anyone ... blame them. It's the straight white men who are responsible. Remember - divided we fall. These guys want us all to fall and fall hard, especially now with President-Elect Obama in place.

Newt Gingrich9 Rick Warren Photobucket
Ron Prentice James Dobson Tom McClintock


Pictured above are Newt Gingrich, Rick Warren, John McCain, Ron Prentice, James Dobson, and Tom McClintock.

Monday, November 10, 2008

Letter from Alice Walker to Obama

Nov. 5, 2008
Letter from Alice Walker to Obama


Dear Brother Obama,

You have no idea, really, of how profound this moment is for us. Us
being the black people of the Southern United States. You think you
know, because you are thoughtful, and you have studied our history.
But seeing you deliver the torch so many others before you carried,
year after year, decade after decade, century after century, only
to be struck down before igniting the flame of justice and of law,
is almost more than the heart can bear. And yet, this observation
is not intended to burden you, for you are of a different time,
and, indeed, because of all the relay runners before you, North
America is a different place. It is really only to say: Well done.
We knew, through all the generations, that you were with us, in us,
the best of the spirit of Africa and of the Americas. Knowing this,
that you would actually appear, someday, was part of our strength.
Seeing you take your rightful place, based solely on your wisdom,
stamina and character, is a balm for the weary warriors of hope,
previously only sung about.

I would advise you to remember that you did not create the disaster
that the world is experiencing, and you alone are not responsible
for bringing the world back to balance. A primary responsibility
that you do have, however, is to cultivate happiness in your own
life. To make a schedule that permits sufficient time of rest and
play with your gorgeous wife and lovely daughters. And so on. One
gathers that your family is large. We are used to seeing men in the
White House soon become juiceless and as white-haired as the
building; we notice their wives and children looking strained and
stressed. They soon have smiles so lacking in joy that they remind
us of scissors. This is no way to lead. Nor does your family
deserve this fate. One way of thinking about all this is: It is so
bad now that there is no excuse not to relax. From your happy,
relaxed state, you can model real success, which is all that so
many people in the world really want. They may buy endless cars and
houses and furs and gobble up all the attention and space they can
manage, or barely manage, but this is because it is not yet clear
to them that success is truly an inside job. That it is within the
reach of almost everyone.

I would further advise you not to take on other people's enemies.
Most damage that others do to us is out of fear, humiliation and
pain. Those feelings occur in all of us, not just in those of us
who profess a certain religious or racial devotion. We must learn
actually not to have enemies, but only confused adversaries who are
ourselves in disguise. It is understood by all that you are
commander in chief of the United States and are sworn to protect
our beloved country; this we understand, completely. However, as my
mother used to say, quoting a Bible with which I often fought,
"hate the sin, but love the sinner." There must be no more crushing
of whole communities, no more torture, no more dehumanizing as a
means of ruling a people's spirit. This has already happened to
people of color, poor people, women, children. We see where this
leads, where it has led.

A good model of how to "work with the enemy" internally is
presented by the Dalai Lama, in his endless caretaking of his soul
as he confronts the Chinese government that invaded Tibet. Because,
finally, it is the soul that must be preserved, if one is to remain
a credible leader. All else might be lost; but when the soul dies,
the connection to earth, to peoples, to animals, to rivers, to
mountain ranges, purple and majestic, also dies. And your smile,
with which we watch you do gracious battle with unjust
characterizations, distortions and lies, is that expression of
healthy self-worth, spirit and soul, that, kept happy and free and
relaxed, can find an answering smile in all of us, lighting our
way, and brightening the world.

We are the ones we have been waiting for."

In Peace and Joy,
Alice Walker

© 2008, Alice Walker

Sunday, November 09, 2008

Rituals Leading to Miracles

Texts: Luke 11:37 - 47 & On the Edge of a Miracle by Alexandra Billings.

What a week we've had. Lots of excitement - some people with hope and some with despair. Since Obama has become our President Elect there have been increased reports of racism. Since Proposition 8 passed in California there have been increased reports of homophobia. I believe these declarations and acts of violence are from a few extremists who know how to make life miserable for the many. I also believe that their dander is up now and if we who are peace-loving take peaceful strides to shut them down, we will prevail. This election process was vibrant and scary; it pitted loved ones against each other, enemies even more against each other to a degree I haven't seen in a long time.

On November 4, 2008 most of us participated in a cyclical ritual of our country. The ritual begins with a process and ends in an event. I voted early this year, but I still participated in the event of the tabulation and calling of the election. I participated in that part of the event as a spectator. I have many friends who participated by going to Grant Park.

The last few elections have been rituals that felt somewhat empty and meaningless. Not just because of who won or lost, but because of the way the people were or were not invested in the outcome. This year many more people participated, and people of different stripes, too. This year, it seems to me, that the transformation that occurred during this election ritual was at least as much about "we the people" as it was about those who were running for office. I have not always participated in the presidential election. I remember telling my friend's mother, that if Jesus wasn't running I wanted nothing to do with it. I was an 18 year old white lesbian talking to a 40-something year old African American woman. She just shook her head at me and said, "Oh, Child." I was wrong then and she knew it with all her heart.

It took me to my 30's to start voting. But this year, for the first time, this ritual held significant meaning to me. As the level of hate-talk rose, so did my level of transformation.

What does it take for a dry and empty ritual to become meaningful again? I think it has to connect to something that we care about. I believe that a ritual becoming empty, dry, and meaningless isn't a benign thing. It is malignant. It infects a society ... a community. It brings about an apathy that deteriorates the community - its ambition and passion; its compassion and unity. An empty ritual is worse than no ritual at all. It tends to leave people feeling resentful of wasting their time and energy, and it also seems to make more obvious whatever else feels empty and hollow.

We, here in this community, work intentionally to keep our rituals alive and vibrant, rich with meaning. Take for example our communion ritual. I love what we do and how we do it. I also love our prayer covenant time. Pretty soon we are entering the season of Advent. Advent is a process ritual that has defining ritual events. We are going to labor to make this rich and vibrant and full of meaning. This church service is a ritual that can easily become dry and stale - devoid of meaning. We try to let that not happen.

In our Biblical reading today, in Luke, Jesus is accused of not participating in a the ritual of hand-washing before having dinner. This isn't the same ritual we grew up with when our parents or guardians asked us as children, "Did you wash your hands?" This isn't about physical cleanliness, it's about spiritual cleanliness. Jesus didn't do it and didn't care about it. He found the ritual to be hollow and without transformation or miracle. Jesus accused his accusers of being pretty on the outside but ugly on the inside; clean on the outside but dirty on the inside. Jesus says that these religious leaders, "... tithe mint and rue and herbs of all kinds, and neglect justice and the love of God; it is these you ought to have practiced, without neglecting the others." Jesus isn't saying that they shouldn't wash their hands ... that they shouldn't have their rituals. He is saying that he's not going to participate in the ritual just for the sake of the ritual. If it isn't accompanied by working for justice and loving God, he isn't interested. Not only is he not interested in participating in those rituals, but he severely condemns those who do participate without also participating in causes for justice and love for God.

I know that not every ritual is going to end up in a miracle or in some kind of incredible transformation. That would make a miracle more of a consequence to an action than a miracle. I do believe though, that our rituals should have transformative aspects to them, and they should be accompanied by a greater work in this world that we live in and the love for our Divine Beloved. I believe we should offer ourselves to the experience of transformation. That we need to be open to being transformed ... to experience a miracle.

Alexandra Billings could not have had her transformative moment - her miracle - had she not been open to the power of the moment. Her awareness of the blowing of the wind, the shouts of jubilation, and the intensity of the man with the cigar led her to her moment. A ritual had occurred while she was teaching a class and she knew it was going on. The power of that ritual spilled onto the streets and into her soul. She received it.

In contrast, the Pharisees participated in a ritual of cleansing that left them unaffected ... unchanged.

Who are we? How are we? What are we? Are we open to the power of the moment? Are we participating in our rituals, compelled by our love for our Divine Beloved? Does our transformation spill out into the streets? Does it affect those we touch? Do we give ourselves to the Holy Presence that connects us and participates with us? Do I? Do you? Do we?

I encourage every one of us to tap in to the Power of the Presence of the Holy. To see our coming together in community as a Sacred ritual and one pregnant with transformation. I encourage all of us to carry ourselves bigger, like the man with the cigar; to bend from the strength of the blowing of the Holy Spirit, like the trees; and to allow ourselves to be affected to the point that it is evident to others. This isn't about "winning souls for Christ" or "making converts." This is about being affected by the ritual, and then being open to live the power of that miracle.

Specifically, as we prepare for Advent, let's be mindful of the rituals we perform and the choices we make. Let us know what is meaningful for you during Advent. Is there something that you just love? Is there something you feel a longing for? Let us know.

The rituals of this community are sacred and holy. We are a sacred and holy people. Let's hear what Jesus says, that we should practice justice and the love of God, without neglecting our rituals.

Illinois Gender Advocates - Day of Remembrance Vigil

Chicago, Illinois U.S.A.

Illinois Gender Advocates is sponsoring a candlelight vigil hosted by the Center on Halsted scheduled to begin at 5 P.M. on the evening of Sunday, November 16th, 2008 to honor the memory of the transgender and gender variant men and women throughout the world who were killed during the preceding year on account of their gender expression. The vigil will be held on Center of Halsted 's 3rd floor rooftop deck at 3656 North Halsted St. (Halsted & Waveland), Chicago and will last approximately one hour.

The featured speaker will be Diane Schroer, a decorated special forces veteran and terrorism expert, who won her historic sex discrimination case against the Library of Congress on September 19, 2008 (Schroer v. Library of Congress (2008)).

IGA's Day of Remembrance vigil also includes several prominent speakers from the City and from the LGBT community. Speakers include Bill Greaves, the City of Chicago's LGBT Community Liaison; the Rev. Bradley Mickelson, New Spirit Community Church, Oak Park; Rick Garcia, Political Director of Equality Illinois; Casey Schwartz, Health Educator & TYRA Coordinator, Howard Brown Broadway Youth Center; Lois Bates, Transgender Health Manager, Howard Brown; Laura Velazquez, Anti-Violence Project Coordinator, Center on Halsted; Cyndi Richards, Chair, Illinois Gender Advocates and Stevie Conlon, Board Member, Illinois Gender Advocates.

Everyone concerned about the level of violence perpetrated against the LGBT community is welcome and encouraged to attend.

Contact: Stevie Conlon (847) 652-6893 derivativs@aol. com